Let me break it down for you. I do believe I have a somewhat addictive personality and am glad that the lure of drink & drugs never really appealed to me on any great level, as I have the capacity to embrace it whole hog and be that crack head on the corner, scratching, drinking strongbow, begging for pennies at 4am on a December morning wearing nowt but shorts and a vest. Luckily or not so luckily for me my addiction manifests itself in the form of the sweet deliciousness that is dessert.
In order to demonstrate just how ludicrous it can get I will take you back to the summer of 2009 where I tirelessly searched for and failed to find a limited edition Haagen Dazs flavour, before finally posting the search to Facebook where I was told it was stocked in Blockbuster video and Sainsburys local. So that's where I went, initially with no joy but eventually finding it on a day where I visited almost every Blockbuster and Sainsburys local in South London. Determination, I hear you say, until I tell you that at every shop that didn't have the flavour I wanted I bought another flavour instead... I ended up with a freezer full of Haagen Dazs, was about £35 lighter in pocket, had to take actual food out of the freezer to make space and the flavour I had searched so tirelessly for was not all I had hoped it would be... The next few days of Haagen Dazs combination sundae's and eating it for lunch, snacks and for dessert after the Haagen Dazs based dinner will always be one of my best memories though... Point made?? I think so.
The past few days have been strange I am definitely craving a dessert fix and am not sure if I can actually hold out, it's getting harder rather then easier as the days go by... In Asda while buying "Cheerios" I somehow found myself in the bread and cake aisle. A place I don't usually venture as Mr Kipling cakes in packets don't do it for me. The Battenburg's were whispering sweet nothings, the French fancies were being amorous and the Apple Pies and Bakewell slices were positively lecherous... I think I may have been sweating, but I was definitely feeling light headed and left Asda with nothing...
While searching for a coat of arms in a photo library I find myself trawling through hundreds of dessert images. I am sidetracked for 40 minutes looking at slick, professionally taken photo's that included 'Delicious chocolate pie filled with warm fluid chocolate mouse and decorated with mint and chocolate sprinkles' it looks like something out of Master Chef but is nowhere near as delicious looking or sounding as 'A mouth watering parfait of strawberries, blueberries and raspberries all nestled in a decadently sweet cloud of chilled whipped cream and dressed with a fresh mint leaf garnish' or 'A decadent dessert of sliced banana, caramel, and cinnamon. Vanilla ice cream is sandwiched in the middle, with a crispy banana slice on top', sounds pretty pornographic I am literally salivating and have wasted 40 minutes of my day daydreaming... Pfffff....
At 10.30 on Saturday morning, while my child is running around naked, I decide I must research cupcakes for my Mum as she is thinking of selling the cakes that she makes, which she should have done years ago... So, I ignore the naked child and spend the next hour drooling over cupcake makers and suppliers dreaming about the flavours and icing combinations that I would have... More time wasted... At my cousins house for dinner I find myself neglecting conversation in favour of cookbooks, flicking straight to the desserts and sweets section. I choose the desserts i'll make when I complete my challenge (I never cook). I think about sourcing ingredients and who i'll invite to dinner parties (once again, I never cook). I think about new desserts i'll try in order to tantalise and stimulate my tastebuds... Creme brulee begins to sound delicious, as does bread and butter pudding, things I have never previously been a fan of. I am looking at restaurant menu's and deciding which dessert(s) i'll have when i go there. I currently have a list of about 50 places to visit.
I have lost my focus. Not eating dessert has got me thinking about dessert at every possible moment. Every task somehow leads me to a place of looking at, thinking about or dreaming about it. I am permanently sidetracked in a desert of hazy sugarlessness in search of my best friend, my companion, my partner. I feel like i'm having a long distance relationship and my other half is soon to return... 8 days, 192 hours, 11520 minutes and counting...
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